Thursday, October 29, 2009

My Music Library

So, I meant to be productive today. I wanted to do laundry, do some grocery shopping, and dump the extra door and fender to the recycling place today. I need to by some black shorts by Friday too. For Halloween, Sarah, Katrina, Mary Lou, and I are going to be The Incredibles. I need to buy the shorts the the costume. We're going to have a member from the ward take pictures of us. Then on Friday night, we are going to the ward Halloween Dance.

Like I said, I wanted to get things done today, so I can do homework the rest of the week. Like always, I got distracted. This time, I was distracted by looking for and downloading songs from and Yesterday, I reached the end of my library for the second time. That told me that I needed go get some new songs because I wasn't going to find anything new in my library. The first time I went through my library, I was shuffling through every song. I did this because I wanted to be kinder the songs that I was listening to. That means I would get bored less often. However, I didn't care about that anymore the second time through and listened the album by artist option.

I deleted some songs, but not as many as the first time. At first, I wanted to be kinder because I'm more tolerable to music that annoys or bores me on some days. However, I just realized that it's easier just to go through the album and delete any songs that bug me. I was down to 3,300 songs. I've realized that I have enough songs to keep me entertained for the most part. Now, I want songs that entertain me. I especially want to find those songs that I repeat over and over again. I love those types of songs. However, after repeating a song for so much, I need a long break before I hear most of them again because they start to bore or annoy me.

Pretty much all music that people listens to really annoy me. Andrey, my former boyfriend, was the only person I knew that had tastes similar to mine. Actually, he introduced me to trance and techno, mainly ATB and Aura. Now, I have tons of that type of music because of him. I just don't like listening to pretty much all the music one hears on the radio. It annoys the crap out of me.

Tuesday, October 27, 2009

O-chem Test 2

Stupid internet. I wanted to do more studying for my test tomorrow. I really hoping and praying that I'll do well on it tomorrow. I'm planning on studying a lot more tomorrow before it. I just hope that I'll get through enough where I'll feel comfortable about it. I haven't even gone through all the problems in the back of the chapter for any of three chapters. However, I've gone though most of the problems in the chapters though. I was really hoping that I could gotten though a chapter. I just want an average or above average grade. I don't think I'll bomb it. Yesterday, I studied the wrong chapter. So, I didn't do the take home quiz because I didn't know how to do it. I'm banking that I'll do well on the test. It didn't help that I went to FHE and got distracted on the internet when I got back home. Well, I think that I'll keep up with my reading for now on for O-chem because I wanted to go through all the problems in the chapters. Last time, I didn't go through a chapter and that hurt me on the test because I forgot some things. However, I did go through all the other chapter's problems. Wish me luck. I'll need it. I hate getting nervous about tests because I should be able to handle them since I'm going part time. It's just really hard to make myself to do homework.

Saturday, October 24, 2009


Hey, Guess What???? I wanted to search more about Paul Tom today. I didn't come up with that much. However, I did find Vanessa's blog. She wrote about the first and only BJJ tournament that I've competed in so far. I only fought against her and Taz. I thought that I wrote about the tournament in my blog. However, I couldn't find anything. Probably, because nothing really happened.

Vanessa is around 30 years old and weighs around 200 pounds. I put up a good fight. She took me down pretty quickly. For some reason, she only was working on my arms when on mount. I don't remember her trying to choke me from mount which is weird. Roberto said that I was doing all the right things by not exposing my arms. I think that he expected her to win faster because she had a year of experience. It's pretty cool that she even has a two photos so us sparring. I like the photo where she's armbarring me. It looks like it's locked, however, it's not. The ref should have let me tap instead of stopping it because I escaped a few seconds later. She would have won anyways because she was the one who was on top and had the advantage.

I waited a long while until I fought Taz. He beat me pretty quickly. I got a bloody nose right after sparring with him. When the tournament was done, I wanted to spar with Vanessa again. However, it was stopped short because my nose started bleeding again. I remember trying to sit up when sparring, but laid back down because of my nose. She felt really bad afterwards. I told her that I've always gotten bloody noses and it wasn't her fault. She told me that members were from my dojo where yelling so loud that when we sparred that she couldn't hear her's helping her. I remember Nick or Zack telling me to use the wall when sparring with her. I thought it was weird because we never use the walls. However, that wall was padded.

The Party

I've decided not to go to the tournament because forty dollars is too steep just to compete and lose. I went to this special party that the BYU BJJ club today. It wasn't as fun as Wednesday night. I think it's because I got to work with Brian that night. I love working with him because he likes to joke around a lot. He's lots of fun to work with and has tons of knowledge because he's a purple belt. However, he doesn't wear it. He's really good. I need to ask him if I'm still using too much muscle because Eric said I was tonight. Colin said that I need to be nicer when sparring too. Like trying not to shove my forearm in Logan throat so he can let go of me from his guard. That didn't work anyways. I don't know. I learned that I can use any pain compliance technique that I want. That's how I learned to be more aggressive and not afraid that I'm going to cause someone pain. I remember that I gave older Nick a huge scratch on his chest on accident. It was all good though.

Logan is a beginner at the club, so he won the first match with ankle lock. Then, we went had a second match that lasted forever. We are evenly matched for the most part. However, he had the advantage because he was on top of me for most of the match. He loves closed guard which I'm horrible at getting out of. So, I tried stacking, choking, and wearing him out so he can let go of me. However, that didn't work. It was weird going that slow so long. If we any of us slowed down and stalled in Roberto's dojo, we count down until someone got a better position. If nobody did, he stop us and say it was a tie. Colin says that the club likes to have slow matches like that. I think it's just weird.

I don't know who's right about BJJ any more because Roberto thought that not many of the guys knew much basics. They know finishing moves, but they know how to properly defend. They don't know all the things in the middle. All I want is a black belt in BJJ who can tell me what's good and not good. It's like Roberto thinks that a gym like school called Throwdown sucks. He says the guys that train there has awful technique. However, Coach Pease says that the instruction there is top notch. He says it's not for everyone because the class sizes are big. I don't know who's right anymore. I don't have much knowledge of BJJ like I do with Goju-Ryu. All I know is a principle from what I learned when throwing the discus. It all technique and speed while throwing it. One cannot use muscle because that tenses the body. A tense muscle doesn't move as fast as a muscle that not tense. Plus, it's better to be more flexible so the muscle has more elasticity like a rubber band.

Tuesday, October 20, 2009


Right now, I'm totally excited. Why?? Because I just found out that a big grappling tournament is coming up. I knew about this tournament, but didn't know how big it's going to be. I've only been in one tournament so far. It cost me twenty dollars. It was alright. I fought against a woman who had a year of experience. I did alright because I only had a few months of experience. She mounted me pretty quickly. It took her forever to armbar me. Actually, it wasn't even a good armbar because I got out of it. However, the person that was reffing stopped us and said that she won.

The last tournament that was held at Throwdown I skipped because Roberto wasn't taking anybody to it. Afterwards, I found out that I could have taken first in the Woman's division because I have more experience than all the girls which placed. I know that because all the girls were from the BYU club. I could have gotten a cool sword!! After my first tournament, I wanted to get much better because I didn't want to waste my money. So, I trusted Roberto and didn't go.

I watched a promotional video for the up coming tournament. When watching it for the second time, I realized that Roberto was in it. Then, I noticed that Xzavior's mom was right next to him. Then, I realized that the two guys that are pictured before the movie starts are the guys that I met during my training in Roberto's dojo. I think that they trained in the Utah Valley University's (UVU) BJJ club.

I started thinking about the possibility of going to another tournament and competing. Then, I thought about how Roberto and the guys helped and cheered me on when I competed. Whenever anyone competes, Roberto becomes the corner and tells that person what to do. He said that eventually we'll learn a code where our opponents wouldn't know what he's telling us. When anyone starts telling what to do when I'm sparring, I get much better because I have an objective in my head and have the will power to pull through.

If I compete, this tournament will cost me forty dollars. That's a little spendy for a tournament. That's with it's discounted too. The normal cost would be sixty dollars. So, I don't know. If I do this, I need to start training right away to get ready for it. My side and chest feels pretty much healed. However, I haven't tested that by sparring yet. I think I was overtraining. I know that Roberto thinks doesn't one can overtrain by doing the type of exercise that we did. However, I knew that wasn't true.

We tried to push ourselves to the max each day. So, I don't think that we allowed ourselves to recover. I know that the more that one trains, one can increase the intensity, frequency, and longevity of the training. However, I think that we trained a too hard a little to much. I'm glad that I got out when I did to let myself to heal. I know that if I kept on going, I would have healed slower because I would have went to every practice. Plus, I would have probably started doing things before I was ready for them.

Sunday, October 18, 2009

The Island

HMMM. Whenever I write in this blog, I start thinking about BJJ and how much I miss it. I know, I know. You can say that I can going to a new dojo any time now. I wanted to go to BJJ this morning; however, I went to bed too late which was around two thirty AM because I watched "The Island" with Sarah. I really liked that movie because it was a science fiction action movie which what I wanted to watch. When I we watch movies together, it's usually some drama chick flick. It's alright; however, I do miss seeing action packed movies. "The Island" had a pretty good plot. It's about some a clone that starts questioning the utopia he's living in. So, he escapes it with his girl friend. A company was using the clones for people's insurance policy's like if they anything happened. The owner hired a hitman to kill the clones. However, he kills the exact copy of the clone instead. The girl friend gets captured on purpose.

The company killed all of the clones which were growing. They wanted to kill the rest of the clones because of they thought that curiosity was a bad trait. However, the main character and his girl friend killed the main guy and freed the clones with the help of the hitman. There wasn't enough dialogue which made me really care for the clones at the end of the movie. It was pretty funny watching the owner try to choke the main character. Lincoln ended reaching for something while being choked and then hit the owner. I thought that was pretty unrealistic. It didn't even look like a good choke either. It's pretty funny how one notices these things after being trained. In the movies and TV, people always die right after they pass out. Now I know that's not the case. It takes a little while for them to die. I don't know how long though. It probably depends on what type of choke one does too. I found a good review about the movie if you want to know more about it.

Tuesday, October 13, 2009

More Sleep

I'm sorry that I'm not doing anything interesting on a regular basis anymore. I have to focus on school and allow my side and chest to heal. I can still feel it when I press down on my chest. I felt my side when doing laundry last night and walking to the library today. I was somewhat surprised at that because I haven't felt it for a couple weeks. I don't know how it will react if I go to BJJ. Hopefully, better because I want to go 100 percent as soon as possible. This break has been good because I'm more social with the ward and doing more homework.

Again, I'm sorry that my posts became not interesting to read. For the awhile there, BJJ was the only thing that was exciting in my life. Now, I just go to school. I should start exercising again. It's just so easy not too. At least I've been going on time, which I love!!! I've been getting tired around nine or ten. Lately, I've been going to bed at 11:30 PM. Which means that I get seven to eight hours of sleep every night. My body really needs that because any thing less will make me tired during the day. With BJJ, I always wrote these really long posts that took me an hour or two to write. Then, I'd get less than six hours of sleep because of my writing and me getting excited about BJJ.

O-chem Test

I need to remind myself that doing laundry takes forever. I should have done it right after my classes. However, I did family history work for five hours today. I needed to do some O-chem homework today because I haven't done any O-chem since Wednesday. I found out that I got a 74.5 percent which is right on the median and a little above the average on my test today. That's alright, but I thought I would have done better because of the amount of studying I've done. I really need to study tomorrow because I think that I'll have a quiz on Wednesday. Like I said, I wanted it study today, however got distracted doing family history work. It's going to take years to go through all of my family history because of all the duplicates.

Saturday, October 10, 2009

Death of a Salesman

I went to watch Death of a Salesman today by Theater Mitu. It was the best play I've ever seen in my life. I think it was better than Lion King that's a Broadway production. It only cost me six dollars to see it too. This is the first play that I've seen in Provo. It was hosted by BYU. The original ticket price was 11 dollars. I wanted to see this play because two years ago, I took a theater class at SCC. I loved that class. Part of the reason is we got to do lots of improv which was a lot fun. Part of this class, we watched Death of a Salesman with Dustin Hoffman. I didn't realize how old that movie was because I just discovered that it was made in 1985!!!!

I probably came in a half an hour late because I thought the play started at two thirty instead of at two. When I came in, I was lost because had to figure out who everyone was and what was going on. Eventually, I started to remember the characters. When watching the play, I imagined all the characters that were objects as real people that I saw in the movie. I remembered Bernard, Ben, and the ladies. I imagined some of the scenes from the movie too.

I loved the objects because the bought life to the real people and other characters. Ben was a lighted up fan, the boss was a long florescent light, and Bernard a little one. Willy was just like as Dustin Hoffman portrayed him in the movie. However, Biff was much more emotional and strong. In the movie, he seemed more of a wimp. Hap got so annoying that a punching bag portrayed him well. I've never seen so much anguish and hurt in people before. I've only seen it in movies. I was got so involved in the story. I really wanted to be verbal. At first, I was, but noticed that people were looking back at me. So, I tried to be quiet. I didn't want to become that annoying person. It's so hard though because I wanted to talk to and/or scream at the characters. When I become emotionally involved with anything, I love being express my feelings either verbally or physically.

This picture is taken when Willy is having a flashback, During a flashback, Biff is the football shoulder pads while the real Biff on the back portion of the stage being the voice for the pads. At first that was confusing because I didn't know why they were talking some football pads instead of the actor of Biff. In the present, Biff would be always carrying the pads for the most part. In the picture, Hap in in the background carrying the punching bag. Multiple times, Hap would ask his parents if they noticed that he was losing weight because he's always jogging in place with the punching bag on his shoulders. In the present, Hap would be the punching bag on a pole with the puppeteer being his voice. At the last scene, the puppeteer had his mask off when they were fighting. That was such a wonderful play!!! It was three hours long including the intermission.

Here's a their website so you can take a look at more of their pictures so you can know what I'm talking about. Here's a review about the production too.


I really like seeing how many people visit this blog. It's kind of cool. Right now, everyone is wanting to read more about President Monson. One of the Google searches is "Has President Monson seen Christ?" I thought that was really interesting. I don't think it really matters. Probably, he has though, but won't tell us because it's way too sacred. I think that all the prophets has probably seen Jesus Christ in one point in their lifetimes.

I went and saw Toy Story 2 in 3D today in the movie theater. I haven't seen that movie for a long time. So, I squawked a lot. For those who haven't met me, when I laugh, I sort of screech. I slide my voice to a very high note like a warm up instead of doing a regular laugh. It's funny that I go really high because I was an alto two. That means that I go lower than most girls. When I squawk, those high notes are really supported and doesn't make that much energy to hit them. However, when I sing high, they aren't that supported so it's easier to sing in an octave lower.

Tuesday, October 06, 2009

Hidden Blessing

Man!!! I haven't written for a week now. Sorry. Last Monday, I stayed up all night and my sleeping schedule went through a loop. I slept during the day and was up all night. Plus, I dived right into my family history. Last Monday, I discovered that my church, The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints, finally let it's members in Utah and Idaho use the new Family Search website. I started really working on my line. This new website lets us know where temple work has been done for our ancestors or not. My line is so huge!!! When going back, I ran into King Josiah, Jeremiah, Issiah, and the king of Troy!! I couldn't believe that I ran into some famous people. Then in another line, I went all the way back to Adam and Eve. I couldn't believe it!! I didn't know that one could go that far like that. I couldn't believe that I ran into prophets and kings in the Old Testament. That's a long time ago. Mary Lu said that it's pretty unusual to have a line that big. I was looking at her line because it's pretty small compared to mine.

I became really absorbed in that for three to four days. I'm not working on it as much now because of school. I have an O-chem test tomorrow. I still need to go through the problems that are in the back of two chapters in my O-chem book. I'm sorry that this entry is pretty boring. If only Roberto didn't kick me out, this entry would be way more exciting. Actually, I'm very thankful and glad that he kicked me out because I'm way more devoted to my schoolwork now. I'm working on getting caught up now. I didn't do so well on a O-chem quiz. I'm being really hard on myself because I became so obsessed about BJJ. School is way more important than BJJ. It was just hard to balance because I was having the time of my life training that much. However, I was letting my homework slide big time. I'm just glad that I was kicked out before any of my tests. My homework load is bigger during the summer term.

So, I promised myself that I'll catch up before I do anything. I still might do some things with the BJJ BYU club. However, I still want to be kind to my side. I hardly feel it now which is a very good thing. I don't want to practice and feel it again afterwards. I want to take an aerobic class or two here at BYU work on my cardio. I don't want to lose the muscle and cardio that I've built up during my training.

So, I'm keeping dreaming about Roberto. However, the last time I dreamed about BJJ, only Zach and Nick was in my dream. The guys like Nick and Zack will advance faster than me in BJJ now because I'm more focused on school. I feel a little sad about that. Last week, I was thinking about writing Roberto a message saying that I was sorry that I hurt his feelings and that I still wanted to be his friend. While training, I discovered that I'm pretty much on an equal playing ground with everyone else. I think that's so cool because everything else which involves being on my feet, I always lag behind. I was thinking that I won't go back even if he accepted my apology.

Now, I don't want to write him a message any more because I think he visited this blog again. If it was him, he definitely knows how I feel about the whole situation. I'm pretty happy at myself that I haven't written anything to him since he kicked me out. That tells me that I'm successfully distancing myself from him and getting on with my life. :) At least, people will have more information about him because of my blog if they search for his name on Google. I'm really trying not to say anything bad about Roberto on this blog because I still think he's a good person, just mislead and misguided, unlike Chinen. I know that people constantly visit my Northwest Profiles on Sensei Chinen post which is a good thing.

I want to save this little entry that I wrote on September 24: "I just watched the Double Helix in MMBio today. It was really thought provoking. I watched Watson and Crick be detectives and figure out the structure of DNA. They had to pull from multiple different sources. They were also racing against time too. It was making me think why I’m here at BYU. It’s because I need to become an innovator and thinker. We solve problems and draw from multiple view points. I think that I need to suck it up and start doing my homework. I just want to play and not do it. So, I wait until the last minute. Plus, I’m always getting distracted here at home." This movie really made me think why I'm here at BYU.