Monday, September 25, 2006

Captain David and the apology

Hi. I had lots of fun in karate class today. Sensei wasn’t there because he went to South Africa. As we were waiting near the gym, I saw Sempai Eric. I couldn’t believe it and became really happy because he’s so nice to me. He told me where Sensei went and I told him what happened and why I that I haven’t been in the dojo. When Sempai Derrick walked in, we had to stop talking because we had to warm up. After class, I stayed behind to ask Sempai Derrick a question. Before I could, he started talking about Captain David. When Sempai Derrick left, Sempai Eric said that Captain David got into a horrible motorcycle accident a week ago on Saturday. He said that Captain David almost lost his life and will be in the hospital for two months. Captain David went around a corner too fast and fell off his bike. He went head first into a rock that went through his visor and into his skull. Plus, the impact broke his back. He had to have four hours of brain surgery. Then, Sempai Eric told me to come back and say that I would like to make amends to whoever I have to. He said that I should keep my apology short and simple. “I would like to make amends. I’m sorry for what I did and it will not ever happen again. I’m sorry for my ignorance because I didn’t know any better. I’m was curious and I'm learning. May I come back and continue my training?” He said that they will say yes. He said when people get disciplined like that; Sensei has them to think it over. Sempai Eric said that he as seen some very good practitioners get scolded and never come back. Sempai Eric said that it weeds out the unserious ones.


Becky said...

Sempai Eric is wrong. It doesn't "weed out the unserious ones". What it weeds out are the ones who think highly enough of themselves that the will not tolerate that kind of abuse and manipulation. You are not the one who needs to apologize. You did not do anything wrong. You should not have gotten disciplined in the first place. Apologize for your ignorance??? That's rediculous. If anyone should apologize for your ignorance, it is your sensei and sempai. It is their duty to teach you, and if they fail to do so, you do not owe an apology for that.

I strongly encourage you to find another dojo--one that won't manipulate you in this way.

P.S. If you don't publish this comment, I'll understand. I wouldn't want you to get into trouble for something ELSE that you didn't do wrong.

supergroup7 said...

I'm sorry to hear about Captain David's accident. I will keep him in my prayers. I hope that he has a speedy recovery, and heals right back to normal.

It is good to hear that you are feeling better about your situation, and the upcoming apology. May everything work out for the best in your situation.

I would encourage you to use this moment to explain, and inform your fellow dojo mates that you are mildly autistic, and that this isn't an excuse for your different behaviour, but that they can expect that you may not react the same way as others would all the time. It's just part of who you are. Take me, for example, everytime I join a dojo, I need to explain about my skin condition, and that it isn't contagious. After awhile my fellow dojo students get so used to seeing what I look like that they aren't bothered by it at all, but at first.. well.. it can be quite scary (even to me).

ZenHG said...

Which is precisely in keeping with what I had said regarding your apology.
Short and to the point. Let them know you are sincere and serious about continuing your training.
No need for over-the-top detail and any form of justification is completely out of the question.
Just apologize and move on.